When your friends give you advice on not to watch a movie! listen to them.. pls!
Well, I didn't and went ahead and watched ChandniChowk to China... and Oh My God! did I regret watching it or what...!
To give you some background, the last movie I watched was SlumDog Millionaire, so I was in a feel-good-movie-mood. And my poor unsuspecting soul was exposed to the tremendous torture of what we call a slash-brain-humor. I felt like jumping in to the screen, and slapping those Pseudo-Chinese men! Well, to start with... Akshay Kumar has a fake paunch, which miraculously disappears after some time when he starts doing Kung-Fu. Well, we shouldn't call it Kung-Fu.. we should call it Magic-Fu. Cos the things he that he is doing, is not possible even with Kung-Fu. I don't think I have seen even Jackie Chan or Superstar Rajni Sir (:P) do all those stuff (Pun very much intended ;P).
Deepika Padukone is playing twins (O-Mah-Gosh). One sista is Indian and One sista is Chinese (utter painfull Ram Shyam combination who get lost in Kumbh ka Mela, well the only difference is that they get separated at the great Wall of China). By this time, I was left speechless... I thought I would catch up some sleep, but the horrid sound effects didn't let me sleep either! Wat torture... :|
And then to add to my misery, a flying hat kills Mithun Chakraborthy and Akshay kumar gets Pissed on!!!!!!! WTF! I had it, I had to know how far Nikhil Advani can go with this non sense. But then he surprised me. I think he even out-surprised himself. Akshay kumar returns aheemm... Kung-Fu Kumar returns to avenge the murder of Mithoon AKA Dada. And he plays Moses!!! Oh Yes!! He plays Moses! So, the movie is targeted towards an audience which includes: Indians, Chinese and Jews. (Grrrr...)
Being the Kung-Fu Kumar AKA Moses, he uses his Magical Kung-Fu to separate the waves of the river around him.. the waves raise up and wash out the bad guys. Phew!! After this mindless torture, Meow Meow (Errr.. that is the name of Chinese Deepika Padukone!!) starts doing some Kung-Fu of her own Genre!!! While Poor Indian Deepika is deprived of all the fun and Kung-Fu-Frolic.
Well, by the end of the movie, my brains were screaming for mercy, and all I wanted to do was to go and kill myself by one of those chinese Flying hats!! :P
Anyone of you.. Please if you find that flying sharp hat thingy... Please email ASAP.. I have a hitlist in mind!! ;D