Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Dreams Of Change!! Ichhadhari Pumpkin.....

Okay! I am sure you are startled by the weird title, and you think, what could possibly be more weird. The Mother of all weird dreams haunted me late last nite. I hope it wasn't early morning!! (fingers crossed).

Coming back to the dream, I was slowly walking past a dark alley ( I should ideally be running in full speed past a dark alley! but apparently I was strolling around), when suddenly I realize that I am not wearing any shoes. I am surprised at the fact that I am walking around aimlessly in a dark alley with no shoes on, and then I turn around slowly thinking that I should head back home. Suddenly, I hear a squeaky sound (quite Squeakily familiar) which calls out my name... I turn around and there is no one!! I almost have a mini-heart attack, but then out of curiosity I find myself calling out like the first victim of a horror film 'Who is it?'. The squeaky voice answers ' It's me Mrinalika, down here.. arrey idhar dekh na'. I look down and there is a bright Orange Pumpkin lying in the dark alley. The eyes are cut out almost like the Halloween pumpkin lamp-thingy and it talks. Not only does it talk it claims to be a friend. At this time you guys must be pretty freaked... I admit so was I. If this wasn't a dream, I would pee my pants... Anyhoo, I look down at the pumpkin and try to reason with it that it can't be Mrinalika, and that its absolutely not possible that I am standing there talking to a bloody pumpkin. And then, the pumpkin AKA Mrinalika looks up at me and says: 'Upasana believe me, its me Mrinalika. I am soo sad, I look so orange, and my head is looking so fat, Can you pls give me a pair of earrings?' ...

I was so taken aback by the Pumpkins demand that I found no other way to react but to open my own earring and prick them through the sides of the pumpkin head. Mrinalika seemed happy. And as she grew happier, the Halloween pumpkin style smile emerged. Now that did it for me!! I had had enough of this shit by then, I ran as fast as I could from that creepy place (Sorry Mrin for leaving you out there in that orange/talking pumpkin with earrings on).

Like all other women who think that they have some psychic abilities to interpret dreams and that there is a hidden meaning within dreams, I also thought the same.. till I Googled it. And then it hit me!! I am not going to explain more, I am just writing down what I found out there, and I have no explanation for it ( I think its utter crap, in my defense). But you guys take a call yourself.

Dream Interpretation:

Pumpkin: A pumpkin is a symbolic of the female sexuality. To see a pumpkin in your dream, implies openness and your receptiveness to new ideas and experiences.. In this regard, it may represent some situation in which time is running out.

A talking Pumpkin: It is a symbol of transformation, related to the popular fairy tale of Cinderella where a carriage turns back into a pumpkin. A great Transformation is on its way!!!!

------------------- Need I say More?? LOL :P

Mrinalika.. XOXO :D

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Birth of the Corporate Bitch!

Re-birth, Re-vamp... words are not enough to describe my sentiments towards this wonderful phenomenon that occurred in a relatively dull working place today.

A little glimpse of what we call miracle in plain English, got me to thinking

When I woke up this morning I had absolutely no idea about the blinding
storm of fierce fashion that was about to hit me! Me: Unsuspecting poor soul,
dragged my lazy ass to office on a mundane Thursday. Then, it all happened....

A Sudden phone call from a friend (Specimen Shukla) woke me up without my
morning coffee... In a rush of urgency her voice sounded almost muffled.
"Come to the stairs outside, Quick!" And I knew, something had happened.

As I went up to the stairs fearing a tragic event, or a huge gossip...
An almost perfect picture greeted my eyes.

......A lady and her new black shoes.

I once described her to be the Queen of Ugly shoes and ill-fitting clothes. When Ugly shoes saw her out of the shop of a window
they literally did the 'Someone's gonna buy me dance'
. But today she
looked up at me in mockery and those shoes just glowed in perfection.
She was sitting there with a crisp white shirt, denims (which did fit her well)
and so-out-of-her-league shoes. But they fit her so well, that I was stunned and
just stared. There was a weird silence of a few moments, but then it all came together. Let the rejoicing begin!!

Magically, Alice had turned in to the Corporate Bitch! Months of our persuasion
finally paid off, and this day a new high fashion:'Jalwa' (as we like to call it)
is born. By the sheer awesomeness of her ensemble she managed to blind each
eye, and even invited naughty intentions of the men around. The sound
of the heels caught the attention of all mere mortals around, as they
flocked together to admire the new office bitch collection outside the

The new line of Summer collections by Bhattacharya, or should we call her 'Madam X' going forward, raised a few eyebrows and stopped a few hearts.

But all in all, we have seen today that nothing is impossible....
As a wise man once said (Wise/spider watever): "With great Power comes Great Responsibility"....
and we all know what that means, we all look forward to more of cutting
edge fashion from the collections of the corporate bitch!

Until then, this is your friendly neighborhood Blogger signing off! :)

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

..... Because Family Comes First!!

I know, I know... "Its all about loving your parents". But once in a while when you look back at age seven or eight, dont tell me that you have never thought to yourself "Why did my mom dress me up like Hippe-meets-Snow White?" ... "Why did I wear those Knee length white socks with frills in the winter just to make mom happy?" Why Oh why!
The answer lies in your heart.... *Its all about loving your parents*.

I have suddenly realized that I have covered all sorts of random topics, starting from Ramayan to Fish theories, but I have never really written about the stuff that matter to me most... that make me what I am today! My family of course. My family is an interesting amalgamation of "Paranoia Meets Super-Chilled-I dont give a Damn-Ness". My family has guided me through tough times, and has taught me how to handle a situation.... But most importantly: they have taught *how NOT to behave in a situation*.

Meet the Parents:

My Dad, AKA Mr Chilled out: A nuclear explosion may occur in my backyard and my dad may be sleeping or reading the morning newspaper calmly.

For outsiders, my dad is the coolest parent anyone can have!! If I was a character from 'That Seventies Show' Drunk-Doped kids around me would go something like "Dude your Dad's a Rockstar" (AAHH every girl's dream!). My Dad has never told me not to stay out late, not to talk on the phone, not to go out, not to cross the street. He has never been bothered if I have been kidnapped or mugged or lost. According to my dad, if I get kidnapped, the criminals will parcel me back with a " I am sorry Note' and will pay my dad the ransom money!! Yeah! he is funny.. :D (He really cracks me up! :|)

Sometimes, I wonder what is it that will make my dad raise one eyebrow! He has happily beared my shopping expenses, he has happily signed my teacher's angry note and Only given me a sad look (Just a sad look) on seeing a bad report card. I knew I could never get in trouble with him. But you see, this too has a silver lining!! My biggest Puzzle was trying to figure out how far the line was. Where do I stop, and what do I have to do to get him really mad!! I am still in the process....

My Mom AKA The Mother of all Daily Soap Queens. Tulsi, Parvathy stand apart... here comes my Mom. My Mom kind of compensates for my Dad's reluctant coolness. She hyper-ventilates, she is the definition of Paranoia.

Till date!! (and I am twenty-three years old).... If i dont pick up her call-- She interprets :
A. I am unconscious.
B. I am Dead.
C. I am tied up in a corner crying and robbers are looting my place.
D. I have fallen down the stairs.
E. I don't have stairs at my apartment, so I am back to being unconscious.

I call her up once I get up in the morning to let her know that I slept well, I have to call her at nite to tell her I am going to bed. I have to call her during the day to assure her that I am alive!

FlashBack: Age 14: When I sent my driver back from school telling him that I will come back on my own and that I was hanging out with friends, my Mom thought my driver was lying and that he had formulated an elaborate plan to kidnap me!!! When I come back home, I would realize that she has marched up to my school to raid the classrooms.

FlashBack, Age 8: Once she read in the newspapers that some kid had been to the loo in school and got locked up inside and had fainted or died. Since then, my mom reminded me every day before sending me to school that I was forbidden to lock the doors of the loo while I went to Pee. I was apparently not allowed to lock the bathroom door while doing my job :P

I find it quite disgraceful, but till date I lie to my Mum about what I had for dinner. If I tell her that I had a sandwich or noodles for dinner, she may catch a flight to Delhi and start cooking dinner for me! So, to avoid the relentless drama, I make up my imaginary dinner to satisfy her, and while I am at it.. I cook up a three course imaginary meal. :D

So, you see... this is the reason that I have turned out to be such a mature and balanced individual in life. Stuck between the Extremist Mom and Non-violence Dad I had to follow my own path, somewhere between the two poles, and I turned out great!!
.... Love you Mom and Dad for always believing in me and making me what I am today!!! You guys Rock!! :D

Monday, May 4, 2009

And I'm Back!!

I know you guys missed me!! ( I like to pamper myself sometimes). However, I have a decent explanation for what kept me away from my first Love AKA 'Bitching on Blog' for sooo long. Reason no.1 : I went for a vacation-- YAY! Thailand :D
Reason no.2 : I had shit loads of work after I came back and I felt like I had hit rock bottom with layers of work on top of me just piling up. Reason no.3 : I caught up with my second favorite pass-time... Oh Yeah! Sleeping. :P

But then now that I am back, there are a few things that I need to bitch about, I few things I need to say out loud and a few things which I absolutely need to get outta my system. So, here it goes....

For all the summer vacation enthusiasts, Thailand is the cheapest destination you can go to and shop till you drop. But make sure before you go there, you need to carry a English to Thai Dictionary. The simple reason being, people over there remind me of Dumb and Dumber. For a country which survives on Tourism, they know zilch of English. If you ask them for a toothbrush, they get you a pillow. If you ask them where a cigarette shop is they will nod at you smile and drive away. When you scream your head off while playing Dumb-Charades they walk away with their pride. And Oh! I almost forgot, they absolutely love the word 'ONE MOMENT PLEASE'. That is about the only English that they will ever learn. Now that I am back, I can win at any game of Dumb Charades.

For all my shopping fans! I am back, and I am back with a bang. Yes! I shopped and it felt soooooo good. I was in cloud 9 as I wheeled my cute little shopping cart from one end of the retail heaven to the other, almost flying and gliding through the tons of uber awesome clothes! And then there was Duty-free!!!!!!!!!!! Shopaholics Heaven!!

The good thing about taking a vacation is that you feel like you have worked (errr) sorry.. Slogged for so long that you deserve a break and then you start counting days and ticking off days in your calender! And one fine morning you wake up with butterflies in your stomach and realize that the day has come. The bad thing about vacations is that it comes to an end too soon. I wish time flew like this when I am at work slogging my ass off.

Anyhoo, now that I am back as the lean-mean working machine, I will have more time to write/bitch. And yeah! keep waiting for my recent haircut AKA disaster story..... COMING SOON to a blog near you.

Ciao :P