Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Nightmare Dramas & an Unfinished dream

Im moody when I want to be. I know that! No questioning the intentions behind my anger spurs here. It just so happens that I can get angry when I am sleeping too. Because of something that someone didn't do in my dreams. Yes, I am that irrational.

Came back late after a nice long drive at night, and was super tired. The moment I hit the bed I drifted off. While boyfee aka Batman was reading this super gripping book (which I now regret giving him since he is carrying it around like an extended part of his hand), I slept off quite immediately. After a while I distinctly remember dreaming about going to some movie, and then coming back home to realize that the door was busted open and a huge hole in my bedroom wall. Well, nightmares can be vividly tormenting for me most times, and all I was doing was shouting and calling for help. How pansy of me no? Now that I think about it, if it was a real life situation, I would have been more forthcoming and heroic and would have called the cops or beaten the thief to death myself. I can be surprisingly bold in most real life crisis situations. But, since this is a nightmare and the sole purpose of a nightmare is to scare the bejeezus out of you, there I was screaming at the top of my lungs. Batman was of course there, and reading his book quietly (yes, even in the dream) and not responding. Which was infuriating. Period.

Struggling and screaming when I woke up and I realized he WAS actually reading the book, sitting right next to me. Furious I was, felt like beating the shit out him but I was too drained out by the whole ordeal of sleep-screaming. Now, obviously he doesn't realize why I was mad at him, and there is no humanly possible way of explaining this rationally to him. I know that, don't worry (but still that doesn't mean that I wasn't allowed to be mad at him for ignoring me in my dreams right?!). To make things simpler, I think I'll need to lay out the expectations and tell him straight that I am allowed to be mad at him for random reasons that he might not understand, but still must accept without a fight.

Talking of dreams now, I have decided to finally create an awesome library in my home (whenever and wherever that home is). So, I'll (rather, we'll) start buying our favorite books, one or two each month and stacking 'em up for the grand collection. Having a library of my own had been my ultimate dream for a very long time. I grew up in a house smelling of old books all the time. My grandfather had this mystery room full of sky high cabinets always smelling of old pages. There was this bed by the side and a small study table. He would spend hours there, and the collection was to die for. He would religiously visit the book fair in kolkata every winter and come back with dozens of new books. Some he'd give away to us, and some would be stored in his special wooden cabinets. I want a small room to myself too. A bright red room covered with mahogany wooden lofts: smiling ear to ear with books. Not just books, but gems. Each will be handpicked, each one ready to fit an occasion. I'll categorize and even buy a label maker. A small coffee maker, a fridge to hold the beer cans and comfy two-seater by the side with fluffy cushions. Yeah, I need the fluff! * sigh * life will be perfect then.

I was doing some research on online book stores and I already have a list of 5 that I wanna buy this month. But, since I am allowed to buy only 2 per month ('cos I aint that rich yet) - I am having a tough time deciding between 'A Thousand Splendid Suns', 'Anne of Green Gables' and 'A death in the family'. I know it's a random sampling, but since I have already decided to get 'A clockwork Orange' for this month, I just have place for one more. I'm still doing some picking and stuff to decide no.2 for September and then I'll be all set to order! YAY!


2 comments:

  1. a thousand splendid suns. oh and you are an idiot. also me thinks you visited my dreams and stole the library idea thief :D... but you don't have all the details it seems. Aruni

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