I wanna know, how late is too late? Can you please tell me, when was the right time to freak out? Now that I know that I am freaking out, why can’t I say it out loud? I know you will judge me and say what were you doing for all these years? Hibernating on your worst fears? But it’s true! That’s exactly what I had been doing for so long. Wishing away problems and pretending they never existed. Well you can call me a coward and an escapist, but I deserve all of that.
I am not trying to defend myself, and I am definitely not giving up, but if I didn’t say it out loud now – then I would have never said it. I don’t know if this is the right time to bring all this up, and I don’t know if it will ever be the right time. Now is the time I wish for a time machine, or a letter to my past self. That would come in handy.
Maybe Sorry isn’t enough at this point. Maybe we need a bigger word to emphasize the remorse, but I’ll come around. I promised myself that I would, I promised myself that I would figure this out… on my own this time!